Me vs. the Beer

I've been told that I should savor any small victories I have during grad school. A paper here, a grade there, it all adds up into making my otherwise routine life more interesting.

Today, I realized that my 6+ years of post-secondary education in the sciences may actually have paid off, specifically all that time I spent in the physics lab.

Why you ask?

I just opened a bottle of beer with my mind.

Just kidding. I used a pair of tongs, which is less impressive than discovering X-Men like powers, but I still think it's pretty cool.

No, I didn't open it to drink it. I needed it to make a cake.

Tomorrow is my friend Rebecca's birthday.

The problem is, Rebecca doesn't really like sweets. Her three favorite foods, that I know of, are Bloody Marys, beer, and chocolate.

So, I tried to find a recipe that combined at least two of her favorite things. I found a recipe for chocolate cake that actually had beer in the cake batter.

Except, I don't drink, and I really didn't want to buy a six-pack of beer. Another friend donated a beer for the cause. She said that it is supposed to taste really good. I just took her word for it.

I took it home (it felt weird having a bottle of beer in my backpack), and after I started baking, I realized that I don't own a bottle opener.

I thought my can opener had a bottle opener on its side, but it did NOT. Frantically, I searched through my drawers for something that would resemble a bottle opener. I had no such luck.

So, then I had to figure out exactly how to pry the lid off. During high school, some guy showed me how to open a beer bottle using the sidewalk edge. Curse my memory! I couldn't remember how he did it.

I tried using a paring knife, and then a fork to pry the lid off, but neither of them worked. And then I saw them: a pair of tongs. Aha!

The tongs had a hole in the handle that fit the bottle perfectly. I was in business.

My favorite part of baking is when I get to lick the bowl and spatula while the actual cake is in the oven. With the spatula halfway to my mouth, I realized just in time that I probably should not eat this batter. Especially because my spatula was coated in sugar, chocolate, and beer. Could you imagine what would happen if I got drunk off cake batter?! (This most likely would not happen)

So, now my kitchen smells like beer and chocolate.

And I totally just showed that beer who's boss. Boo-ya