Rest in peace, Grandpa Lee

My grandfather had two strokes in three weeks back in May, and has been struggling with his health ever since. The strokes left him unable to walk and speak. Since then, he slowly regained his ability to walk and speak, but remained on hospice care.

My beloved grandfather passed away last Wednesday.

He warned me last Christmas that he was going to die this year. I didn't believe him. But just in case, I took time off in May to visit him, and I asked him to tell me stories from his life. I wrote all the stories down in a notebook. I wept when I added his death date to the biography.

One blog post is not going to adequately describe how much I loved my grandfather, or the impact he had on my life. He was the hero of my childhood dreams, the person that sparked my interest in health and medicine, and a source of confidence, wisdom, and humor.

Since Grandpa would not want me to be sad, I thought I would share this story with the 3 people that read my blog. It's my favorite story from Grandpa's life. It's a story of epic proportions, that involves love, war, and the weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. Specifically my grandma's teeth. Ever since I was little, my grandmother always had dentures. No one knows how or why she has them, but she blames my grandpa  (we don't actually know if the teeth part is real, but it's still a fun story).

Here is the story of how Grandpa Lee met Grandma Lee, aka Grandma's teeth:

Grandpa Lee was a handsome young soldier fleeing the Communists. He and his raggedy band landed on the hostile island of Taiwan, where they were not welcome. The current government was suspicious of their intentions. My Grandmother's father was one of those government officials.

Grandpa was on vacation with friends and spotted a beautiful girl in the window of a building. He inquired about her, and discovered that she coincidentally was roommates with his friend's cousin. They attended a dance at a local college, where my grandpa was introduced to the Girl in the Window, my grandmother. They started dating.

My grandmother's dad, a ranking official, was enraged at the match. He did NOT want them to see each other at all. Since my grandpa was still enlisted in the Taiwanese military, he was obligated to go abroad wherever they sent him. Because my grandpa spoke English, the Nationalists often sent him to America for training with the US Air Force. Soon after Grandpa and Grandma started dating, Grandpa was chosen to leave for America for a year to train in Seattle. Grandma was not happy, but her father was ecstatic.

My grandfather left for America, promising to send letters. They continued to write while the Grandfather was in America. While their relationship was growing, tensions in Taiwan also kept building. After the nationalists gained momentum and political force in Taiwan, they decided to persecute the former Taiwanese elite. This included members of my grandmother's family that were current and former government officials, and businessmen that owned mines. Her brothers were hunted down by the government, imprisoned for crimes they didn't commit, and in one case, convicted and killed by the Nationalist government. My grandpa says that one of the brothers was killed for being "too Japanese" (meaning he was educated in Japan during WWII). Things weren't easy for my grandpa's family either. In China, after the Communists discovered that my grandfather joined the Nationalists, they snatched my great uncle (my grandpa's brother) from his pilot training and imprisoned him in a camp for 10 years.

To match my grandmother with a less controversial suitor, my great-grandfather set Grandma up on blind dates with other men while my Grandpa was in the USA. Since she knew that she couldn't say no to her father, Grandma devised another plan: she would make herself look as hideous as possible so the men wouldn't want to date her. Before every blind date, she pulled out a tooth.

Despite severe opposition from family, friends, and political ties, Grandma and Grandpa dated for 5 years before their wedding. During that 5 years, Grandpa was sent to the US three times for a minimum of 5 months to train with USAF. You can imagine how many blind dates can happen in 5 months. By the time they were married, my grandmother wore dentures on her upper and lower sets of teeth.

So, the moral of the story is that love is not easy or convenient. True love, the kind found in epic stories, is a result of perseverance, courage, sacrifice, and work. Neither oceans, nor gunshots, nor distance can drown it, stop it, or suppress its growth. Sometimes love will literally cost you a tooth (or 30 teeth). But in the end, it's worth it.

Rest in peace Grandpa Lee. You will be missed.